I ran, sweat pouring out of all my pores and above the sounds of my gasps for air I could hear the howling cries of the dogs. It occurred to me I had to make some effort to disguis

All I want for Christmas is his two front teeth cause the bastard stole my girl again. She said she really loved so I took her back again. Now he's gone and stole her again

Vel'drav Usstan zhahus natha lotha zaphodiop lu' l' sssiks zhahus aluin harl, Usstan orn'la veldri harl ussta orlingg dal vel'bol Usstan ssiggrin Usstan xunus kyorl.

Heelda heepo

The crowd cheered as the speaker appeared in a dark blue suit. No one knew the topic of her speech or the impact it would have on their future.

Roger Corman wondered how to top himself. "How about Sharktopus vs. Dinocroc." Nah.. I need something new.. or old? Frankopus? Yes! Dr. Frankensteins greatgrandson is a marine biol

The hungry space monkey goes to school on the moon.

Denis the Dung Beetle rolled his ball of muck away from the dung heap before the other dung beetles could snatch his prized lump. It was a wonderful life

My nipples had been sore all day, but I hadn't had a chance to check them - work was crazy busy, and I didn't want to be late for yoga afterward. That night when I finally checked

"I've done it. I've finally done it," I whisper, wiping several beads of sweat from my brow.

A dead cow comes across the sky.

You complain about the rain, but secretly, you adore it.

New York music is music that starts with horn

There's a sheet of paper right in front of you.

The girl on the radio sang, "He has South Dakota arms," and I have no idea what that could possibly mean. Why not North Dakota arms? Are his arms on the Mt. Rushmore of arms? Help!

There once lived a tiny little hippo on a tiny littleland. He lived with his tiny little friend. One day there came a tiny little eagle and took the hippos tiny little friend.

Once upon a time, there was a boy who loved to play baseball. His favorite position was third base. He played baseball every summer with his friends at the park. They had fun.

In case you hadn't noticed I'm going to clue you in a little bit here. There is no secret to happiness. No key to why we're here. No long lost mystery that reduces belly fat. The

"I'll have the salad, thanks." "OK great, will that be with chicken or steak?" "No, no, the salad." "Right, yes. With freshly grilled chicken, or marinated steak?" "No you jackass,

Don't ask where the love has gone. It was a citadel of my imagination that collapsed. Pour me a drink & let us drink to its ruins.Tell the story on my behalf as long as the tears