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Carp is bottom grazers. They feed on garbage which they get plenty of. Asian carp can weigh 100 lbs! When Uncle Doug hit on the idea to use twinkies (in their wrappers) as bait

He was a hippie. She was a pirate. It was never going to work but they tried anyway. This is the story of the star-crossed lovers who swashbuckled pot brownies and

Mr Obsessive-Compulsive had just washed his car. He then drove his car to his mother's house. Along the way he crossed a bridge with a Pelican sitting on a street light. Splat!

Well the dashboard melted, but we still have the radio, so we decided to go on an adventure.

She drew the meat cleaver from the cabinet, and started dragging across the granite countertop. She looked at me crazily and said, "You should have never stolen my hot dog, it made

When the big studios had successfully rebooted every franchise they could, there was no option left but to mash up successful films, their first endeavor being a mash of "Planet

Once upon a time there was a fairy princess who lived in the magical lolly pop forest with her mother, father and little fairy brother...

Easter and Errington Xmas 2011

I tried to keep my eye on the sparrow, but now I was looking at a moth circling an interrogation lamp. "You were looking at the moon, weren't you, but you were not thinking of me."

I remember the day the guns stopped firing.

A monument in sand. He put the finishing touches on his 1:10 scale model of the Cheops pyramid complex, placed the plastic camels and flying saucer, and then stepped back to

'Dobrideen' he said. It meant 'hello' in Russian but I didn't speak any Russian. 'Hello?' I said, 'what did you say?' But you answered me' he said. 'You said 'hello' right back. 'w

"Ommm..." The group wore hooded cloaks and stood in the corn field forming a circle with linked hands. They began chanting and fanned out knocking down corn plants in the form of a

It was the best of times, but actually it was the worst of times. It was the age of wisdom, but really everyone was just an idiot.

On a dark desert highway, cool wind in my hair. I heard an explosion and saw Wurn Snell of Colitas rising up through the air.

Brad opened his store for monkey fetishists in the back of his 7-11, but quickly his inventory became about forty percent Davy Jones memorabilia. It became difficult to hide

At OWS Thanksgiving there will be a drumstick circle.

Every girl loves a bad boy. Until they realise they're cereal killers. I hugged my cornflakes to my chest with the protective instinct of a mother eagle. 'He hates cornflakes' I

After the Nurikabe failed, Jen tired a more traditional means of protecting cheese puffs: burying them underground. "Digging through tile is tough," she said, clutching a rusty