"So, there we were, two miles behind enemy lines, dressed as nuns and smuggling munitions to La Resistance in our wimples, when Lieutenant Hereford had the capital idea of using

Shannon despaired. She had no purple in her Prosperity sector. She had a spiral staircase and spiral staircases drain chi faster than a rat up a drainpipe. As for her Career corner

"Oreius,feed our prisoners to the LYTHIAN DRAKON.Luke commanded."Luke,my brother is going to lose against that CYCLOPS."shouted Agreius.

DarkMaster must have cast a spell on the Broncos, 'cause right now, they're suckin' pretty bad.

Dirk was stirring his coffee with his usual steely purpose. He emphatically unwrapped two sugar lumps, examined them closely and rejected one as substandard. He dropped the more pe

I decided to take dance lessons from Ronnie's Dance, Trance, and Pants Studio, run by the great Ronnie himself. When I found out that Ronnie was working for the CIA, things got

Jack Knight donned his helmet & lowered the canopy. He'd wanted to be a fighter pilot as long as he could remember but lived in fear his jet would explode in a fiery plume of death

If lettuce is so slimming, how come there are fat rabbits?

The lunchroom was full of pissants that hated me. They objected to my warming my lunch, usually sardines, in the microwave oven. The found fault with the fact that i urinated where

Lucie decided she needed to go cold turkey from FS. Being literal minded, she booked a 2 week holiday in Turkey. She got her eyebrows threaded & set off without an electronic devic

You are a molecule of water (in liquid form) floating along happily in the ocean when suddenly……….

Exhausting the possibilities of modern pedagogy, teachers began to resort to "the old ways": Druidic magic, totems, shamanism and vision quests. Surprisingly, the latest data show

Something's wrong with the avocado pears.

The hunter had long given up on finding his home. His walk to nowhere was his daily journey. However, that nowhere became somewhere today. Before him, deep in the valley, was

77 conjoined fighting fish, each a master in their own fish martial art, circled each other warily as the Colosseum slowly filled with water.

Dinner tonight began with an expedition to the Black Sea where I murdered you a fresh Calia filet. I've accompanied it with blowfish sashimi and a raw taro slaw. Enjoy!

The first rule of magic is that for every power there has to be an equivalent amount of energy. For a fire ball, it requires at least seven sacrifices. Mice are convenient to carry

If you've ever bitten into an unripe plum at the precise moment of climax, then you know

Don't worry, she will be safe with the fairies.

These are a few of my most-despised words: Pulchritude. Cauliflower. Leprous. Axe. Quantitative-easing. Blister. Virgin. Trebuchet. Maybe. Flatulence. Me. Make a story out of them!