The concrete felt cool as he pushed his hand into the new pavement. 3 million years later, the fossilized impression was the only sign that mankind was on this planet.

Today was the day Hello Kitty took over the world.

Footsteps on the dance floor remind me baby of you. Tear drops in my eye eyes, next time I'll be true. Whispers in the powder room, she cries on every tune, every tune, every tune

What was that...smell? Bubba wrinkled his nose and scratched his head, trying to match memory with the distinctive odor which suddenly permeated the closet. Mom? Is that you?

Dubbed "Woodtricity," the newly-discovered source of biopower had a controversial side-effect: radioactive, porous nodules appeared on the equipped trees, oozing a sticky mucus.

The language exposed his church-going nature and he finished and departed in record time. Not quite light out, but out of time for donuts, Mrs. O went back inside to collect

I found a strange man in my garage tonight. He was huddled in a corner by the water-heater and was sort of wobbling funny. He didn't notice me, so I slipped back out of the garag

In the end, the computer hard drive never got fixed, but that inspired him to meet his first lover who told him it was futile. Then his would-be boyfriend got high & cheated on him

My neighbor walks past my house every morning under the premise of walking his dog, but what he really is doing is looking in my window. "Hey Harold!" I shout & wave at him

Once upon a time there was a girl named Jo. She liked to teach but she got frustrated with stuff at times. I wish she would be nicer to me. What a mean mean cat!

John Glover popped up into my vision, sitting at my desk. "Hi, Lex! I found ya, Lex! Lex! Leeeeex! Leeeeeex!" "What, dad?" I asked, exasperated. "You're bald, son." He smiled.

OK, I’m an “early adopter,” I admit it.

It was a beautiful night the wind swayed through Amy's hair but then her little little brother James started to hit the wind. and suddenly

I awoke wondering Where i was, then When I was, eyes still closed I took stock. All limbs in place, no major aches or pains, no hint of hangover. Age? I guessed mid 20's. Wrong!

Leaning over the new hole in the floor, our hero peered suspiciously into the murky depths below the apartment complex. "This must be the work of my arch-nemesis, THE INTERRO-GATOR

Jimmer-dimmer Habby-Babby Cheddareater Smith hated his name, so he changed it to Jimmer-dimmer Habby-Babby Cheddareater Jones.

Stop it. Just.... stop it.

If I have to listen to "Livin' La Vida Loca" just ONE MORE TIME... I will not be held responsible for my actions!

'Friggin things musta shrunk up again' she muttered as she yanked on the denim, and completed a perfect impression of an overfilled muffin cup, spilling out the sides. 'Do these

"The babysitter isn't dead,"I told myself as I ate my illegal bowl of vanilla ice cream with chocolate syrup, "she's sleeping". I watched I Love Lucy and picked lint off the couch.