I'd nearly finished loading the hay bales but needed some water. I downed the rest of the bottle & then noticed a rabbit hole near the side of the garage. Squinting into the hole,

"Teines! Teines Pomme!" The orange said with glee. "why the heck are you speaking French, orange?" "Couteau!" He responded. "I have no idea what... AHHHHHHHHH" he screamed as the

"What if when we die, the light at the end of the tunnel is just another pediatricians office?"

Hola, me llamo Juanito.

I dried off and wrapped the towel around my waist. Entering my bedroom, I dropped the towel and glanced up to see my wife's friend standing there. We held eye contact for a full 5

"What about a pop-up book?" "She's an adult. Folded up pieces of paper. That's kids stuff." The clerk lowered his voice. "I'm talking about adult pop-up books." He slowly opened a

Looking back on lessons learned from past transgressions and toward a brighter, better future, I do hereby solemnly proclaim to abide by the following resolutions in the new year:

He stepped out into the night. The fog swirled. The street lights flickered.

In the horror film Spork the main character is chained to a metal pipe. A voice tells the character that if he spoons or forks his leg off he will be set free

With chisel and hammer and long hours worked till dawn. Blood encrusted fingers which ooze slowly down. Eyes that pop and hands that seize with both tongue and lips gripping

One day I late for school and I was running down the sidewalk when all of a suddent I was attacked!! Out of no where this huge mysterous creature emerged from the woods by the scho

Harry spoke slowly, drawing out his vowels in long strokes of increasing loudness. Carol didn't really know why he spoke to her like this. She wasn't deaf or retarded. Maybe he

While working on cybernetic Ultraman underwear in his old lab an explosion fused the underwear to his skin, along with a bats wings. Prof. Fugu used his time vortex watch to try to

Quorn

Mother Nature was restless. She blew around the house, uneasy, wondering how Father Time was doing with their daughter at their first ever Father-Daughter dance.

I just finished up a new section of code that I hoped would save my job at Innetech. When I loaded onto the main server, everything crashed, and my screen cracked. Inside the crack

President Humpty liked to set an egg timer and think things "over easy" when faced with a difficult decision, but now his eggs were poached. His wife Mary Quite Contrary was seen

You know how some people will tell you it's better to look back and say 'I can't believe I did that', rather than 'I wish I had'? Well, I'm guessing those people have never

I got 399 freakin' points!!!!!!!

"I wish we didn't have to wear clothes. That'd be cool unless I lived in a cold place. But dogs look so happy, just spreading their junk on the ground." Kaitlin looked at Mark