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Before me on the desk was a rotary phone,

  • Before me on the desk was a rotary phone, an ink blotter, a rolodex and some carbon paper. Beads of sweat soaked my sun-burned pate. "Dammit! How do I work these things?"

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  • I had to act quick before the bomb went off. I used the ink blotter and carbon paper to write a schedule for my bomb disposal. But how was I to use the rotary phone and rolodex??

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  • Well, first of all I modified the phone so that the rotating plastic produced a small electrical charge that fed into the rolodex that I had converted into a toothbrush. The bomb

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  • was suddenly defused by a charming gentleman named SirOddington, who immediately got out a cup of

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  • warm piss. Cuz Sir Oddington was just so Odd like that. He drank it down and wiped his mouth with sandpaper. He then brushed his teeth with his toothbrush's handle and

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  • and was shocked in the mouth by the battery in the vibrating toothbrush. This caused him to tense. And finally that damn anuerism in temple burst, and

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  • so did his eyes. This was an alarming sight, although he himself was now unable to appreciate it. He tried to pull the electric toothbrush from his mouth but it was welded to his

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  • anus, making it so difficult to remove. Human beings really were just giant donuts, he mused to himself, the electric toothbrush buzzing against the ridges of the roof of his maw.

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  • That last one sat rather heavily in his stomach. Cronus reminded hlmself to chew before swallowing. Meanwhile Homer thought he was in heaven. The tripey folds had so many delectibl

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  • e avenues to explore! Homer & Cronus linked arms slowly melting into each other. After only two hours, all that was left of them was one gigantic fleshy intestine. Love sucks...

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