When i was young I would often deface billboard

When i was young I would often deface billboard hoardings by painting nude pictures over the female bodies. They called me the quick change artist. I think they knew who it was but

toning up their shirts each time they looked at the billboards with the nude pictures on them. See, I had a plan. I would dress them all very neatly and then subject them to

the love of my 2 pet dogs. No tailoring would withstand the slobbering of 2 demented and overjoyed mutts. It was a plan and I'd had worse. After they'd rolled in dead rat, my dogs

rolled in a dead cat, then they'd found a dead human and rolled in that, they rolled in a dead whale, my dogs snuck into a morgue and rolled around on every cadaver

. "We're on a roll" they deadpanned. The two mutts yucked it up. But the audience was pretty stiff. Then my dogs launched into their 'bury the stiff' routine. Bowser said, "A bear

Almost entered the room." Max said, "This is a dog house!" Umbrellas knocked at the door of my house.

and hopped sheepishly outside. "So much for man's best friend," the first said to the second. "But we're not men," The second replied, "We're umbrellas." "Who's side are you on?"

"I'm on the sunny side," said Umbrella #2. The two umbrellas hopped along in silence, too depressed to speak. "Try to open up a little," suggested Umbrella #1. Umbrella #2 would

need help to get a handle on life before it folded on them both. Umbrellas stand up for each other especially when times are tough, and this was no exception. "Got you covered."