Caution: The female of the species is more

  • Caution: The female of the species is more deadly than the male. Some forgot to put a warning label of Helen of Troy. Thousands of men died needlessly because

  • of a glue rationing in ancient Greece.Still,Helen of Troy has followers everywhere...women who will not think twice before

  • making a gun out of their fingers, firing and belching at the same time. It was disgusting. It actually made sick. This woman was so disgusting that she wore men's old faded

  • wife beaters as her panties. Her license plate read I69Bingo. Her breath was horseradish and sauerkraut emanating from betwixt a Grizzly Adams mustache and a President Taft chin.

  • Never lacking for male attention, all eyes were on her as she lumbered her way to her lucky seat at the bingo hall & began setting up her usual assortment of troll dolls & rabbit's

  • feet. When the caller said her number, she yelled "HALLELUJAH!" and when he didn't, "GOSH, DARNIT!" Though the hall was crowded, she had plenty of room. Tilting back in her chair,

  • as reining Queen of Bingo, everyone knew to give her space. As she neared another victory during the final cover all, she would swing her arms in prayer. Lord Jesus give me a B5!!!

  • B7! Her fingers were trembling, and beads of sweat started to fall from her brow. I cannot be decrowned as Queen of Bingo, I've worked too hard for this, she thought. Finally, B5

  • was announced throughout the Bingo hall by Father Joe. "BINGO" screeched from the back of the hall. Damnit, my archnemisis, Squawkers had dethroned me as Bingo Royalty as he had

  • achieved horizontal and vertical bingo with that one little call. But, it would all be okay b/c Father Joe aka Father Handsy and I would be getting horizontal soon enough.



  1. MangoMania Aug 06 2013 @ 13:47

    I'll be checking the availability of I69Bingo license plates.

  2. mensaque Aug 06 2013 @ 15:46

    I'm sure Father Handsy will appreciate the ride.

  3. 49erFaithful Aug 06 2013 @ 16:26

    When I see one, I'll know it's you Mango. I'll be the one honking and making a crude immature gesture.

  4. PurpleProf Aug 06 2013 @ 23:31

    Father Handsy!!! LOL!!!

  5. MangoMania Aug 07 2013 @ 10:01

    hahahaha. I'm sure you won't be the only one making gestures. I just hope people know it references the game and not a dog.

  6. 49erFaithful Aug 07 2013 @ 12:25

    Nice, MM, that cracked me up.

Want to leave a comment?

Sign up!