If only I could die. If only I could descend

If only I could die. If only I could descend into the emptiness of nothing. Then I wouldn't have to listen to my boss talk about the 3 hour procedure of draining his butt pimple.

But I'm too coward to do that. Even the idea of death is enough to scare me.

You see, I have been afraid of almost everything my entire life. Experiencing new things, dogs, pickles, the color purple, and anything else that has the word "doodle" in it,

instills in me the most profound dread, like sitting down to take an exam and realizing you haven't studied the entire semester. I envy the life of dogs.

What do dogs have to do? Have a bone, dig a hole, sleep. On the other hand, us humans, well, our lives are much, much more complicated. But hey, we chose them ourselves, right?

The more I think about it, though, the more I believe that dogs have the right idea. I mean, have you ever seen a human wag their tail?

Humans are impossible to read. You can smell them, but they are more complicated than that. So, maybe I wish that I was a dog. Greeting other dogs goes only one of two ways.

Or maybe I should have been a Panda , lying around all day and still loved by others

I rolled over on my side, contemplating the half-eaten stale glazed donut and my now cold cup of coffee. "I gotta get to class, I guess," I told myself. So I did.