“I need an essence capsule! Throw one here!”

“I need an essence capsule! Throw one here!” the woman shouted to her ally. Quickly fumbling around in her coat pocket, the other woman

cursed aloud, finding nothing. "I used the last essence capsule this morning!" she gasped in realization. Her distressed companion's face drained of color, all hope

of this female incarnation of Dr. Who ever finding the Essence of Nonessentialism was now gone. The Eater of Essence apologized as Dr. Who and her companion entered the TARDIS.

Which had been turned into an exact replica of Oprah's set and even while the fem Dr. Who and companion travelled, Oprah would pop out and shout things like

"Over nine thousand penises" and "Chocolate Rain". By this point, the internet was having its way with Oprah, and Dr. Who watched the two villainous titans clash, beside himself.

Of course, Al Gore had planned everything to go this way from the start when he invented the internet. He'd shystered everyone into believing he cared about the environment when

voting Democrat. Yes; Al Gore would hold the internet hostage! Without constant social interaction, tweeting, IM'ing and internet porn the populace would have no choice but to

go outside & face the sunshine. Fresh air. Interact with other people. Smile at them. Err.. :-) & wave umm... 5FS. Say sup. Sheesh, our social skills are FUBAR. If we all MIRL

maybe our wages won't be garnished by the galactic internet overlords due to data overages. IM me about it. No wait, FB me. No wait, text me. Email me? Ahhhhh! #boycotttwitter!