Pop went the weasel, his eys first bulging

Pop went the weasel, his eys first bulging and then shooting from their sockets. The weasel had been one of the best-known

"Mintos" Poppers! He would chug a two liter jug of diet Cola the swallow a tube of Mintos. This time the resulting "Up-Chuck" was blocked when the tube turned sideways. The weasel

was the signature catchphrase of a totally desultory and tubular rich white skinny penile-implanted freak named Pauly Shore, and he "fell"down the media waterslide into a

stinking vat of sycophantic narcissism that only served to poison his already questionable soul. By the time the news of the cancer

hit his gorgeous ears, he had already devised a strategy to primp his cancer. "Ugly cancer would be most unbecoming of a man so perfect," he said. He instructed his old cells to

meant that he had no cells at all to hold his body together. He went all to pieces then and the few cells he did have left soaked into the fertile earth, later sprouting into

an oak tree. Some oak trees can be very old. An oak tree growing at Greenwich Park was planted by Elizabeth I just after King Henry VIII had died from

Terminal Buttock Gluing, now Henry Viii's Disease. But Elizabeth II one-upped Elizabeth I's commemorative tree planting by planting a persimmon at Gecko High School in Japan.

Harry of course had the last laugh, sneaking out at night and planting pot in Kensington Gardens. "We are not amused" said the Queen, but secretly was. Kate drooled with envy.