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Eventually, all species will become one

  • Eventually, all species will become one

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  • due to extreme inbreeding that results in evolution giving up. This final, ultimate species will be incapable of basic thought, and become the most powerful force in the cosmos.

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  • This principle is known as the Jim Ransom Exponent, named after Dr. Ransom, who after publishing his paper on the subject, became the most powerful person in evolutionary science.

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  • This was mainly due to the mutant arms that developed as he was researching his eponymous exponent that, while threatening, he used mainly for solo high fives. Ransom

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  • girls like his multi-armed body because he never got tired of

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  • simultaneously giving foot rubs, carrying their shopping bags, and "rescuing" puppies from animal shelters. And you know what they say about guys with multiple arms: multiple

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  • arms, multiple penises. Well that part wasn't true.Actually we had a detachable penis attached to one arm called a hectocotylus. Once the ladies had this, they didn't need the rest

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  • of the script. This was an improv class, after all. The hectocotylus was a challenging prop. One lady stood the arm on its end, detached the penis, put it on the hand and

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  • identified her additions to the sculpture as "A Happy Man". "Yes, good," said her bespectacled art teacher. Unfortunately the improv class's hectocotylus ell to the floor then.

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  • The octopus's flailing tentacles latched onto the sculpture wrenching it to the floor-a scream escaping it's beak. "A Happy Man" shattered & with it, the sculptor's hopes of fame.

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