Laying on his deathbed, the frail body and

Laying on his deathbed, the frail body and title of Hansewurst Freiherr von Pimmel, belied the potency of his younger days. He'd cuckolded Monarchs as life's goal & lived to tell

of the many princes who had the same red hair and pink eyes of his father. I sipped my bourbon and thought about the pillow I held in my hand. Just a minute of struggle and he'd

the infamous eyes of Ethelred, quite literally because his eyes were extremely dry and therefore extremely far from crying, but he was Bug-eyed Royal and if he wanted to cause

an entire shipment of Snacky Cakes to be ahead of schedule, then his mad scheme would overthrow the thin illusion that our delivery services couldn't do better. To stop him, we

set up a road block in a hippie relocation village. As the Snacky Cake truck stopped, the doors of huts opened, causing an outpour of smoke and hungry, mosying folks. The creme fil

led Hostess cupcakes went first, but soon everything was sold out. Just as a riot was about to start, I noticed a hippie in a Stevie Nicks dress on the Snacky Cake truck roof. He

started stomping up and down on the top of the van "What do we want?" raged the rabble rouser. "Twinkies!" the mob roared. I turned on the Turkey-in-the-Straw and tooted the horn.

Unfortunately, because of a tough economy, the maker of Twinkies went bankrupt and you can't get them anymore. Tell that to the angry mob! This is a bit a tight pickle, she

wiggled her bottom. Keep it in there, he said, that Twinkie lovin' mob will want it and it is our last bit of food left. She squirmed and they ran into the sun set holding hands.