Capricorn - Co-workers might take advantage

Capricorn - Co-workers might take advantage of you. Realize your potential and write in your journal about new directions and ambitions. You will meet a dog.

Scorpio - Order the crispy bean curd at the Peking House Chinese restaurant. You will meet a cat. Save it from its fiery doom. Consult the fortune cookie for further instructions.

Scorpios often trust their horoscopes. But at the Peking House, the waitress told Gerald they were out of crispy bean curd, and they did not serve cats. A guy at the next table

whispered "Statism is an ex-post facto justification for human ownership." No matter what the cat's horoscope said about crispy bean curd, that statement IS true! Whoever thinks

beans don't go with toast is bound to be surprised by English cuisine. I only like a few of their television programmes, but I do want to try their fish fingers & custard if once.

This was Prince Charles doing his famously bad impression of an American. Camilla rolled her eyes and continued to pick at her face. "My god, " she thought,

"What kind of royal screw-up did I marry?" Then Camilla laughed at her own joke. Prince Charles' idea of humor was "different," no doubt. For example, one time he hid a whoopie

cushion in the royal water closet, thinking that the noise would be hilarious the next time someone went to flush. But instead of comedy gold, the Prince was surprised to hear a

bell ring for service from the room next door. The Prince not to be disturbed from his Privy Chambers sent his Groom of the Stool to investigate. Meanwhile the prince knocked over

his sexuality, already renowned for its ambiguity. Simultaneously, the Stool Groom pronouncd his disdain for corny jokes.