How men calculate:"The shoes cost 299$!?"

How men calculate:"The shoes cost 299$!?" How women calculate: "Well they were marked down from 599$ & I got this matching purse for only 199$ which is normally 399$ so I saved you

500$! And if I get the dress which is down 199$ from 499$, then it'll be the best shopping day ever!" Thats it, this woman is done throwing away my money like she is allergic to it

. I ran off with my last penny and planted it in my backyard. "I hope a money tree will bloom before she finds my..." "Honey, can I borrow your credit card?" I watered the penny

but instead, the penny grew into a stupid lemon tree! I was way to deep in debt for a LEMON TREE! She couldn't find my bill. Because it wasn't my bill, it was

an old receipt for Disney World circa 1972. Back then Mickey Mouse would gladly show off the side view of his head, something he no longer enjoys. But a Lemon Tree? Surely not..?

Actually it was a Cumquat tree, with hearty, robust miniature toy oranges. Awkward oranges. Because people tried to peel the tiny things or because of the name which when said

out loud was enough to make a nun blush. So they took to calling them "comehitherquats" to lessen the moral turpitude which the name possessed, while still maintaing the

vows the coquettish nuns had taken. Sister Nubbins was beside herself with despair. The comehitherquat nuns would have to be punished. Especially Maria.

How do you solve a problem like Maria?Sister Nubbins contemplated her choices of appropriate action to take with Maria & the other coquettish nuns."That's it! Praise the Pope! I wi

ll get you retrained - you CAN break free of the hormone-driven, sex-starved clichės. You'll be Rocket Scientist Nun or Relatively Sane Nun. They lived unstereotypically ever after