My plan was simple. I had to switch bodies

My plan was simple. I had to switch bodies with a girl who ruined my life - but when I became close with her, things became difficult; she fell in love with me. What happened? Well

I let our relationship blossom for, oh, about six months before I revealed my body-swapping plans. I know how that sounds, but how was I supposed to explain that I needed

to switch bodies with her to avoid prosecution? She agreed readily, because she had always loved bad boys, so why not try being one? Plus avoiding a lifetime of period cramps.

Nature always finds a way they say. I might have avoided the period cramps but now I had to contend with the comma chameleons which festooned my new bad girl persona. Asceticism

chic didn't work so well with my preferred personal color palette of red, green, and gold; red, green, and gold. i made it work though, didn't I? My new bad girl name: Girl George.

Of course, a free spirit by any other name is an oddball, isn’t it? You can make any Plain Jane come and go, but you can’t make her come and go as Girl George lest she grows a pair

of Venus Fly Traps in her living room. Girl George connected electrodes to them and recorded their vibrations. They ended up as background singers on her latest album, entitled

" The phone rang & the operator eagerly answered: "Bunglia Records, can I take your order?" "How can we call if you didn't leave a #?" "You're right, Sir, & you're creeping me out!

" Our call was silent for a moment. I said, "Yeah, it's like my hand knew the number but I did not." Meanwhile my hand was drawing a sigil on my leg with a Sharpie. "Got to go!"