In his heart of hearts, Dracula was a softie.

In his heart of hearts, Dracula was a softie. He spent his downtime knitting wool koozies for tubes of blast-frozen blood and sketching ideas for marshmallow shapes. No one knew

that he'd almost killed himself when he was walking with the knitting needles. He'd tripped over an extension cord and jammed it into his gut. Dracula was clutzy

when he wasn't in bat form. It'd been so damn long since he'd been a human. Since he'd been born. Alucard was beside himself with embarrassment as his dad got ditzier every decade.

Which he did not. His dad also enjoyed frequent bouts of vodka with two ice cubes in the glass, and a zing of lemon zest. What his dad had not told him, was that he was a gourmet c

onnoisseur. In fact his dad was so skilled in the tasting of food, he frequently received requests of the Queen of England to be her royal custard taster. Her Majesty ofcourse

never really ate the sweet dishes, but she couldn't offend the Royal Custard Guild. That is how he and his dad came to meet the best baker in London: Zachary Brown. Zachary had a

small custard shop Kensington Gardens, known for it's delicious honey-rose egg flan. It was around this time that the Royal Custard Guild was searching for a new official Royal

custard dish for the Royal Tea.Their tasters fanned out across London looking for the perfect custard but the shop with its honey-rose egg flan was named "The Queens an Olde Bag"

the butcher didn't care and was arrested for Treason amongst the follow man and for disgrace of the Royal Party.