Sheltie looked at Human square in the eye,

  • Sheltie looked at Human square in the eye, and began the mind-meld. "Look into my eyes, you are getting very guilty, guilty because you have not give me the bacon."

  • The Sheltie had learned "hypnotism" from David Blane, well David Blane's assistant. The human was now under the Sheltie's control. She told him to open the refrigerator and pull

  • out the dog food. The human did this. The Sheltie then barked some more commands. Open the Door! The human complied. She rolled over. Scratch my Tummy! The Sheltie had utter comman

  • d of the household & everyone/everything in it. "Let Fluffy the cat in!" The human hesitated but then saw the Sheltie squat threateningly on the Persian rug."I said: Let Fluffy in.

  • Fluffy entered through the cat door. "Hiya, I am home", she said. She wanted food and forced the human to get out of bed and feed her. The Sheltie said he needed food too!

  • The parakeet demanded crackers, the Boa demanded Whole Foods, & the geraniums demanded fertilizer, so he gave Polly saltines, fed him to the cat, minced her, fed her to the Dog,

  • and then the dog pooped on the geraniums, killing them almost immediately. "You forgot to age the manure," the boa scolded him before swallowing him whole. The it was off to the

  • hatter. "I need a fedora with a chin strap," said the boa. "But snakes don't wear hats," said the hatter. "The customer is always right," scolded the boa and swallowed him whole.

  • The boa was God of the hat shop now, he placed each of the most dapper hats on his long body to symbolize his new status. The remaining workers paid homage to their eternal king by

  • donning party hats, feather boas, and plastic fangs. A little dance, a few selfies, and it all went viral. That hat shop became the central shrine of Earth, as prophecy foretold.



  1. SlimWhitman Aug 12 2017 @ 05:19

    LOL I wasn't aware the Sheltie had command of the household, I guess he couldn't charm the snake god.

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