Have you seen that new guy in Accounting?

Have you seen that new guy in Accounting? The one that looks like a real jerkoff? I mean, he looks like the kind of guy that'd

sit on the new photocopier, take copies of his bum & then distribute the copies to all staff in a memo asking for a rating out of 10. But he can't beat the guy from sales who

showed everyone his 8x10 glossies of his Hawaiian 'sales meeting' "Man, that was a great time!" as he punched his coworkers in the shoulder. "Anyone get laid... off? Heh-heh."

He was wearing a white leisure suite & a hawaiian shirtt.Everyone despised Herb,but without his shady business dealings the station would belly up any day. Less said "Herb, your in

, bro! Seriously, you've made Employee of the month every month for the past 8 years. Now, if you wanna keep it that way, Herb, lemme give you some advice: Don't wear Hawaiian

Toilet Seat covers as hats. Although the flower designs are awesome and laced with irony, the Boss's toy poodle ate one of them and died terribly at his wife's baby shower

because it was reserved for the honoured guests. Lord Snooty, Baron Betterthanu and Viscount Pompus Up-Myself were seated near the gift table with Lady Horseface and Dame Ouch

wrestling in the corner and making odd noises. "Would this holiday nightmare ever end?" I asked my semi-conscious self, tossing & turning. What's that smell? Bacon? Waffles?

Just then water splashed on me hard; hard enough to wake me up from my dream and back into reality. I rubbed my eyes with a smirk smile on my face and left for work.