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See Dick drive. Dick drives a flashy car.

  • See Dick drive. Dick drives a flashy car. Dick picks up Jane. They go to the drive-in movies. See Dick put the move on Jane. He's at first base. But he's not playing baseball.

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  • See Dick get to a combo second/third base when he “accidentally” touches Jane as he reaches over to adjust her drive-in speaker. Oh no! Jane has thrown her soda in Dick’s face! Now

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  • Dick's is getting out of the car and on the way to get some napkins to wipe his face,Jane's "friend" Julia pulls him behind a coming attractions board and starts ti lick

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  • her ice cream with fervor. "Mmmmm! Apricot-Almond-Pistachio! My favorite!" Julia cried. She proceeded to smash the cone in Dick's face, who'd just finished cleaning it with napkins

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  • he'd kept in his glove compartment from the last time he'd stopped at the Flyin' J. Dick was pissed. "God damn it Julia. You threw the Ice Cream in my face." Julia was a Bonono

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  • and a crazy Bonono at that. She continued to hurl ice cream at Dick. Dick finally decided he'd had enough of this. He pulled over to the side of the road and shouted, "OUT!"

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  • She stopped off at the local Oberweis store and ate ice cream, not realising Dick was there. He let her walk home.

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  • Dick drove home several times but he could not make himself drive into their drive way. She never noticed because she was putting the groceries away upstairs with the babysitter.

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  • "Where should I put this banana?" asked Bruno the babysitter. "Just put it in this box," answered Dick's wife. Meanwhile, Dick had parked half a block away and came crawling toward

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  • the fire hydrant with his big wrench. He almost had the cap off when his wife said, "Guess what's in the box." Dick loved guessing games. "A turtle?" "No." One final turn.

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4 Comments

  1. SlimWhitman Apr 10 2017 @ 04:45

    Dick & Jane stories always were so divorced from anything in the real world - i thought it would be fun to have one with social realism.

  2. Woab Apr 11 2017 @ 15:46

    You say bonono, I say banana...

  3. LordVacuity Apr 13 2017 @ 10:11

    I just noticed the sequel is 404d. How does that happen? Did it get flagged?

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