I imagined the table to be like a giant rectangle

I imagined the table to be like a giant rectangle alien. It was a flat hard alien from a planet of table legs. Then my client wept. The judge spoke. Stupid judge, always ruining

my space table's chances in court. "Your honor," I interrupted with no regard for the ongoing judicial proceedings, "could you please translate that into Martian? My table doesn't

translate what you say." The jury rolled their eyes collectively. I could hear one whispering to another "He's malingering alright!" But I wasn't malingering I really was crazy and

jumping up so violently that his judge's wig fell to the floor. "I will not have this racket in my courtroom!". From the jury box I surveyed the room, and through the doorway came

the conga line that had started earlier in the foyer. "Well, that should kick Justice in the fanny", said Judge Reinhold, who rose to the bench just as Major Major Major had.

Judge Reinhold slipped out the back, disguised by the conga-lining jury led by Major Major Major. There he entered an illicit affair with his wife, Mrs. Reinhold, who brainwashed

the windowwasher into thinking he was a Cuban cabana boy so that she could fulfill yet another of her kinky role-playing escapades. Major Major Major burst in on the Reinholds just

as they were about to sit down for Sunday roast lunch. The Reinholds asked Major Major Major to join them and set an extra table setting. Meanwhile, the windowwasher became suspici

ously similar to Major Major Major.It was a weird moment for the Reinholds who, when sitting there eating with Major Major Major, looked out the window and saw...his reflection?!