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...... (o)(o) ...... <?> ...... /^~^\ ...... /\V/\V/\V/\V/\V/\V ...... \W/\W/\W/\W/\W/\W/ ...... ^\/^\/^\/^\/^\/^\/^ThatsnotastoryV^V^V^V^V^V^ ...... [_]_[_]_[_]_[_]_[_] ......

(What do you get when you cross a pig and a bear?} =^owo^= <^@-@^> {A pear?)

No, a big pear. Or would that be a big pair? @@ OK, next one: What did the +u+ say when he stumbled across the road?

"!#%&8@#" Ha haha ha ha! Good one! I didn't really get his humor, but I went along with it, since he held my future in his hands. "Now your turn!" he urged. "Uhh...OK. Um...%4##}?"

He didn't laugh. Instead he said, "What did my mother ever do to you?" Whoops, he was mad. I watched my future slowly dissolve. Quickly, in an attempt to save my future I blurted,

"I fetishize older men in suits!" My opponent looked at me, stunned. "Th-that's impossible..." he stuttered. "Because

your dad may not be sexy in a suit but, David Gandy in a suit is just off the Richter scale hot." I had to stop for a minute. "No, it's not because he's in a suit. He is just hot!"

My friend spoke up finally, "Look I agree about Mr. Gandy, but can you please stop hitting on my dad?! That's the stuff of nightmares." Flames erupted from David; he was on fire!

Then I woke up and my cat was next to me. She said not to worry. This was the last line of the story, so I could enjoy my coffee and crumpets as usual. Whew! It was only 7am.