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I knew this day would come. Cher

  • I knew this day would come. Cher

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  • is in a new movie. This is the worst day of my life. Cher is the worst. At everything. She is bad at everything she does. And now she has her own movie called Burlesque. I knew thi

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  • but Thi didn't know me. How could I possibly get to know someone whose name I had merely come across in an old postcard? He used to live in Austria, but where was Thi now?

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  • The thought made me wistful. It also made me have the sudden urge to

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  • heave. Accordingly, I began to pick up any heavy object and toss it like a medicine ball. Mom worried about my future, but then got me a job at Slate Rock and Gravel Company. I

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  • throw the rocks at the dinosaurs who would lower their heads and let them roll down their spine and up into the air where another dinosaur would pulverize it to gravel. Mr. Slate

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  • wished he could be 7 again, when dinosaurs were not science, but magic. If only

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  • he could turn back time. But that is of course not possible. He is a man now and must behave as one. Fat chance he thought to himself, these dinosaurs are real, and it is my job

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  • to pick up the dinosaur dootie. So he followed them with an earth mover dump truck, he caught the colossal dookie before it hit the ground. A brontosaurus let one rip and he

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  • then gave up.There would always be more crap to pick up no matter how hard he tried,he thinks.This is not a one man job after all.

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