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How do I get this party started? What necessary

  • How do I get this party started? What necessary steps and actions will contribute to the bountiful joy that I must acquire? The most important rule in planning the ultimate party

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  • is to aquire a kennel of pure bred corgis. During the climax of Fatboy Slim's Rockafeller Shank, release the hounds on the dance floor and say 'Who Let the Dogs Out?' How jovial!

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  • "They know what is what but they don't what is what they just strut what the f*ck. Do the dog strut. Lift your left hind leg. P*ss marks the spot. Smell your partners butt." I rais

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  • ed the roof and the rap battle crowd gave a lukewarm applause. Some boos and a few "You Suck!"s My best reception yet! Then my opponent the Dawg Katcher came up. He barked

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  • at a dog to get him some water. The battle rap started. Dawg Katcher bit into the mic. He said to the crowd, "You're my little puppies now!" It started raining cats and dogs

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  • as Dawg threw uppercuts arbitrarily around him. "Bitch I'll bite your head off and piss on your stuff! You will know I'm alpha when my nose sucks up yo muff--" The crowd howled as

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  • they realised his poetry didn't scan. And was awful. They bombarded the box office for refunds. Dawg was crestfallen. Yes, he was a fighter but he was an artiste too and this cut h

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  • im to the quick & bruised his big Dawg ego. Tail between his legs, Dawg retreated to his Dawghouse & wouldn't come out, even after his agent begged & tried to tempt him to come out

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  • & face the music. Dawg remained a recluse & over time, his agent gave up & fans forgot about him. Dawg could now live his life without scrutiny, without the paparazzi hounding him.

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  • And so Dawg relaxed, finally at peace. Little did he know his evil ex-girlfriend was peering over the hedge with a camera. "This is for dumping me, bastard." she muttered quietly.

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2 Comments

  1. PurpleProf Feb 02 2014 @ 19:46

    Dawg could make a come back.

  2. Chaz Feb 03 2014 @ 07:29

    "And then this cat walked in, you know, not like a cat, like a feline cat, like a real, like, you know,like, you know what I'm saying dawg? Like cats and dogs It was raining, it wasn't raining, we were raving" - FatBoySlim, "Eat, Sleep, Rave, Repeat"

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