51

I like onion rings

  • I like onion rings

    3
  • so much, that when the burger joint I frequented was being held up, I told the gunmen to lay off of the short order cook for the sake of my onion rings. "You don't get to tell us w

    5
  • hat to do! But asking would be nice. We'll let you off this time, because you have good taste in onion rings." The gunmen announced.

    6
  • I shoved the onion rings up through his throat & into his little brain. I grabbed the gun he forgot he was holding on me before his body could drop it. I checked his body for extra

    6
  • limbs but only found the five. Wait, five? That didn't sound right. I checked again. The count was correct. This man whom I had gravely injured with onion rings

    6
  • was none other than Count Snackula. I was rooted to the spot as the great count rose from his styrofoam coffin and beckoned to me with one finger, on which he wore an onion ring.

    5
  • ..and, of course, a Bugle. I stepped forward tentatively. Count Snackula was scary, but my hunger won out over my fear. The Count's eyes were green M&Ms & his mouth

    5
  • Was made of red vines licorice. He looked into my eyes, put a hand behind my head, cradling it, drawing me in for a kiss. I bit into his lips and clawed at his candy eyes! So tasty

    6
  • That I mistook it for the salt water taffy we once pulled together in his kitchen. This was before the television imploded on itself and burned the house down. I had to apologise

    4
  • for my mistake. But the melted, blackened "taffy," belied my error. The house was gone. Did any of it really matter anymore? I would have apologized in any other... but I didn't.

    5

3 Comments

  1. JayBee Sep 15 2017 @ 03:18

    That ended darker than I thought.

  2. Woab Sep 15 2017 @ 12:02

    I think we can blame television.

  3. LunaSta Sep 16 2017 @ 20:41

    Woah... I feel like I should start another onion ring story to give it a happy ending lololo But thank you all for pitching into such a wild onion story

Want to leave a comment?

Sign up!