From the deep within the shadows, a man had

From the deep within the shadows, a man had stepped forward. Cruel were his intentions, but even crueler was his fate. His footsteps rapped accross the grainy asphalt.

He ran as a 10 year old would after seeing a piece of candy, so yummy, he thought. The man had said, "if you get in the van I'll give you candy. So he ran to steal the man's candy.

It was, of course, not candy at all, but cough drops. However, the cough drops were delicious and cherry flavored. The boy was elated with his very wise decision.

So delicious were the cough drops that one could almost believe that they were truly candy. Just another lesson that crime does pay...in delicious cough drops.

Oh sweet cough drops, why must you allude me! your sweet swirly center drags at the soreness with numb, prickling fingers of cough drop deliciousness.

That's it. I now will only uses Lofthouse's Fisherman's Friend. With that solved I switched to the real thorn in my side. No really, I was sitting on my wife's roses.

I took off my shirt & laid on the bed. I sucked hard on my fisherman's friend as my wife extracted the long curved rose thorn from my side. She held it up to light and the drop of

water falling from the tap in the bathroom slowed in reverence. "Did it hurt, darling?" asked my wife, tossing the thorn into a metal bowl. My mouth was too full to answer and I ha

-in. How dare she attempt to murder me, Count Chocula, the dark prince of breakfast cereal! Not to mention that acid is ineffective against chocolate vampires. Just wait, my dear..