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The day of the big exam had finally arrived.

  • The day of the big exam had finally arrived. Gil brought his #2 pencil and his lunch, but didn't notice he'd forgot his

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  • cheat sheet that he scribbled out until 3am the night before. He was really in for a

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  • long day. It was a good thing Ms. Bliss was nearly blind. She wore a sideways pony tail and talked with a lisp. The bell

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  • rang. I was saved. I threw my backpack over my shoulder, avoided the anemic gaze of Ms. Bliss and bolted out into

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  • the crowded hallway. Now to find Bob, the nutjob. Idiot stole my skateboard and it was my only

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  • mode of transportation! But Bob wasn't anywhere to be found. Mind, I didn't look very hard. I got lost after the third trip to the neighborhood saloon. I knew he wasn't in

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  • that saloon, but I couldn't resist yet another glass of 80proof vodka with a strawberry splash. What was I supposed to be doing? Oh right

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  • getting an ultrasound. I felt the baby kick inside my womb and I wondering if it was a boy or a girl. I would soon find out... but I never expected to hear the doctor say

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  • "You seem to be harboring an illegal lobster in your womb." My shock must have been apparent on my face, for my husband clutched my hand, trying to

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  • figure out how to crack the claws of the lobster and avoid some sort of apocalypse. The world was about to end but we had it under control, no fear of crustacean world domination

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