It was my first session, she looked at me

It was my first session, she looked at me all concerned. "and How are you feeling?" I looked at her and cracked a big smile, "Horny."

She gave me a shy smile. "I can take care of that," She murmurs, reaching for....

a pair of pliers. What a nice mechanic, I thought. My boy would love this iron woman. "You know, my son Jacob loves '68 Chevy's too..."

Then the Iron Woman turned to me and said, "Tripod 68!" Her servo's went totally John Balushi and her Welding Arm shot flames into the dad's skull. The boy dropped his milkshake

and screamed "Daddy, I waaant one!". Daddy was still mending his skull though he was clearly annoyed by Juniors whinning. Meanwhile the Ironwoman flamed a couple more bystanders

with inappropriate comments about dietary restrictions. Junior meanwhile had become hypnotized by his own avarice and via subliminal suggestion began to do an interpretive dance

were mistaken for an ancient Korean courting ceremony. The restaurant owner was so impressed he performed a marriage ceremony on the spot. The subliminal voice

kept saying: "Keel de ebil western capitalist dogs." Everyone else at the wedding reception ignored the voice, but I sought out its source. I checked the eatery's tables, seats,

and the lost and found. Not finding anything (and noting again the lack of acknowledgement from the other guests) I realized the voice was from inside. My communism has been outed.