There's no better way to start a morning
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There's no better way to start a morning than by misquoting Lou Reed.
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..and Milton Berle smoked two kazoos to the tune of a toucan in the zoo. Plugged her eyeballs on the way. Shaped her legs, then she was at sea. Its my malady. I misquote Lou Reed
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all time because I mean, why not right? Aging rockers and old bemoaned famous junkies who can still get their way with 20 year old chicks really chap my ass. I misquote Lou Reed
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deliberately whenever I'm in a tiff. But I'm a laid back guy. When I'm particularly mellow I like to misquote Aleister Crowley or Pete Townsend. But this was my 20 year old chick
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daughter who deserved more than blasé adulterations of devil worship. She had a legitimate problem involving a certain young man who
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knew everything there was to know about Star Trek. "Geordi LaForge's visor lets him see right through your clothes!" Not that this had anything to do with
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Dr. Spock but Spock put the kabosh on these things because living on Vulcan was hardly paradise. Outside, it was cold enough to freeze a Peking duck without effort. Hsu-shi was so
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sick of Dr. Spock's un-asked-for baby advice that she took her four toddlers and wedged them between two trees for a while so she could get some work done. Hsu-shi was not a bad
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mom or tree doctor for that matter. She could grow trees like no one's business but, kids are harder. Water them as she may they still whined and demanded and eventually
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drowned due to their obstinacy. She promised herself that next time she would do better. Her husband, Cecil, assured her there would be no next time and actually had her arrested.
7
- Started
- 2013-10-28 04:57:04
- Finished
- 2016-10-28 21:55:01
9 Comments
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EtherBot Oct 29 2016 @ 07:57
this is amazing
SlimWhitman Oct 29 2016 @ 08:36
Dr. Spock wrote a best selling book about compassionate child care. Mr. Spock is the Vulcan serving as 1st Officer on the Federation starship U.S.S. Enterprise.
Woab Oct 29 2016 @ 11:17
My mother read Dr. Spock's advice and look what happened to me.
SlimWhitman Oct 29 2016 @ 12:13
My mother watched Mr. Spock and the result surely has a logical explanation, but I haven't figured it out yet.
Gibber Oct 29 2016 @ 18:21
Slim - "then she was at sea" - ha! said hey bunny, take a wok on the water slide
SlimWhitman Oct 30 2016 @ 05:05
Original Holly came from Miami, F.L.A. Hitch-hiked her way across the U.S.A. Plucked her eyebrows on the way Shaved her legs and then he was a she. Misquote Milton Berle smoked two kazoos to the tune of a toucan in the zoo. Plugged her eyeballs on the way. Shaped her legs, then she was at sea. Another misquoting story here: http://foldingstory.com/1hjjc/ I think we have a second Hotel California Parody on FS but I couldn't locate it. And then there's a discussion about misheard lyrics somewhere...
lucielucie Oct 30 2016 @ 09:53
I started this story because I messed up the quote on my Lou Reed Memorial Fold in this story: http://foldingstory.com/vr99a/
Rebbie Oct 31 2016 @ 15:06
My mom read the book from Dr. Spock and then laughed an spanked me. Look what happened. 0.o Sad.
SlimWhitman Nov 03 2016 @ 04:27
I found the other misquoting stories and discussions: Hotel Foldingstory http://foldingstory.com/1hjjc/ Discussion on misquoted/misheard lyrics http://foldingstory.com/9psbl/#903