Don't read this story. Seriously. It's uncreative,
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Don't read this story. Seriously. It's uncreative, the transitions are awkward, and there's no wit to be found. You'd feel less pleasure than a Scorpio with an Aquarius wife, or
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a mountaineer with a safety net. You have other things to do anyway, everyone knows. Have you moved your cousin from the freezer yet? Tomato harvesting begins soon, you need room!
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Your cousin used the freezer as his personal bachelor pad using the veggies as throw pillows. Just finished seven gallons of spaghetti sauce in frost proof baggies, he's got to go.
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But I can't make him leave because he has a totally sound weed connection and an XBox. So I will let your abominable snow relative stay in the freezer but he has to at least
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fit in the top drawer, 'cause that's the only empty one.' So we crammed Yeti into the freezer, only to find out that his feet wouldn't fit in. 'If he throws in the Kinect, he can
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feel free to saw off the feet. If rabbit's feet are good luck, Yeti feet must be colossal mojo!" but our spirit guide had already faded into the mist. Or the Myst, as it were. Gone
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Country wasn't what I expected when we opened the green book, but that's what we got. We reanimated the Yeti and paired it with Marcia Brady. They wrote the winning song, "
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Another Piece o Shit Icecapades Lick," which was "winning" in the respect it won the prestigious award of "The Worst Thing Ever to Come Out of the 70s". Between Yetis & Bradies,
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Icecapades & the BeeGees, there is little redemption that comes from the 70's, outside of glam rock, harvest gold kitchen appliances & The Mary Tyler Moore Show. Still, the award
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for the gifts the 70s gave us go to: avocado bathroom suites; Abba; prawn cocktail followed by Steak Diane followed by Black Forest Gateau & wife swapping in no particular order.
4
- Started
- 2011-06-24 19:14:11
- Finished
- 2013-08-25 17:33:15
13 Comments
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lucielucie Aug 25 2013 @ 17:53
What's the compatibility of a Leo woman & a Libra man?
Chaz Aug 25 2013 @ 23:44
Dungeons and Dragons - 1974 'nuff said
Zetawilk Aug 26 2013 @ 00:05
Okay, okay, so the 70s weren't /all/ bad. Garfield had a good run too, back in its acerbic heyday. I'm surprised DnD's only that old. You don't need the internet to play it (though it helps, given how hard it is to find human beings you'd want to interact with and who'd be willing to interact with you), just several thousand-page convoluted rulebooks. I wonder if the original DnD was as overly complex as it is today. Seriously, LA+3 if I want to play a wererat? Why can't they just math it better? Not that I've played a game of it yet, but these tabletops could stand to move into Wiki territory. Now, if only there was a way to expedite mapping.
Zetawilk Aug 26 2013 @ 00:08
Oh, right, and Susan Harris' "Soap" was excellent. I'm really just lashing out at variety television. In the Star Wars Saga campaign I'm a part of, I'm plotting to abolish "Life Day". And then there's the inexcusable Super Mario Icecapades presentation...what were they thinking? Now /that/ was "lashing out". Hey, wait, that had to be the 80s. That just opened up a whole other can of worms.
SlimWhitman Aug 26 2013 @ 06:45
When I first encountered DnD it fit in a cigarbox and consisted of three paperbound booklets, some dice and some paper.
Chaz Aug 26 2013 @ 09:02
I had the Player's Handbook. They hadn't come out with the Dungeon's Masters guide yet so I had to makeup rules for combat.
Zetawilk Aug 26 2013 @ 15:11
A group of kids were playing it in middle school and wouldn't let me join in. I couldn't even make friends with /them/. What a sob story. Time to go make some self-deprecating folds now.
SlimWhitman Aug 26 2013 @ 18:46
I remember the long delay between the Player's Handbook and the DMG. I guess that Chaz is referring to AD&D. What I first encountered was in a white box. The books weren't hardback. I guess it was a "Original DnD" as described at Wikipedia. A pity they didn't yet you play GB. It's a lot of fun since it is open ended, kind of like FS in that respect - although we have the 10 fold limit...
Zetawilk Aug 26 2013 @ 18:51
Yeah, I was lucky enough to be invited to a couple of campaigns recently, and they've been just incredible in terms of story--and it's all character driven, too, in that the DM leaves things open-ended apart from throwing out occasional quest hooks. But for the most part, it's the players that steer the action. So it sort of reminds me of a Folding Story in that regard. Chargen can be complex, but I love making tons of characters--so long as I get a wide variety of races and other integral customization options to try out. Despite that, I'm gonna loathe it when one of them gets killed off.
lucielucie Aug 28 2013 @ 03:52
What's all this got to do with Leo/Libra compatibility?
Zetawilk Aug 28 2013 @ 11:35
Well, it all ties in to the 70s, when people were desperately reaching for /anything/ to occupy their minds until video games were invented. I expect a resurgence in this sort of behavior now that video games have been completely bastardized by flash games and smart phones. In the words of David Lynch, "How can you play a video game on your fucking phone?" We're probably seeing it already thanks to a (hopeful) rekindling of tabletops. Other than that, I could create a Scholar class Leonine-race character and he can use his scales to weigh stuff if I take a train in the Alchemy skill.
SlimWhitman Aug 28 2013 @ 12:12
Hmm.. strange my last submitted comment got lost in the ether. No matter. It was just fluff.
lucielucie Aug 28 2013 @ 13:14
http://foldingstory.com/b911h/