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It was just me and Budweiser on Green Street,

  • It was just me and Budweiser on Green Street, waiting for the girls to show. Johnny Cash was singing about roses and

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  • guns. Getting pretty hammered, i was hoping I had at least a shot with the girl with the

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  • birthmark on her face. It was something about the shape of it that really got me going, as it reminded me of

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  • the country of Uzbekistan. I hadn't been there since the summer of '94 when I had to

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  • go chasing after the meaning of life. Really I just drank too much, passing out in all sorts of horrid places. One time

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  • in the fetal position on the floor of the women's room in White Castle. Lucky for me it was

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  • just before closing time, so an employee entered in time to save me from my woes, which she did by calling the cops

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  • who arrived 3 hours later. Of course, I was arrested. I tried to explain that I was only there because

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  • a girl, but the officer insisted, no persisted, I come with her instead. She forced my hands into the cuffs and shoved

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  • her fists into my pants, instantly discovering my giant, squishy mass of....silly bandz!

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