It wasn't her personality or politics that

It wasn't her personality or politics that he'd grown weary of, it was her accent.

She learned English from the Muppet Show. "Good Morning! did you sleep well? Wakka-Wakka-Wakka!" "Here's your coffee MEEEP MEEP MEEP!" "I'll make eggs horde-hor-de-scood-de-doo!"

The only english speaking television program available in Latvia was "The Muppet Show". So Ghundiga, along with many others from her town, were taught to speak "mupplish." Sexy, ye

t disturbed thought Harry, when Ghundiga greeted him with "Moi has always possessed a charm that is lethal to men." They started dating. Her parent's mupplish dialect was rowlfish

"Pass the raisins? Is that what you said?" Jack Benny was unsure about the passive voice of the word "krapis" and he looked expectantly at Harry, hoping for a little help. Poison

Ivy stumbled onto the stage weeping and fell into the comedian's arms. "Mr. Benny," she sobbed,"can you bring Lux back from the Great Beyond?" Jack looked at Harry again. Harry

smiled nervously. After all, his resurrection stone was a fake. Jack realised that Harry still didn't know this was only a stage performance. The Weeping Widow began to sing about

the whirling dervish of life and how the goyim are forgetting the old ways. Harry strained, veins bulging, as he issued the traditional chant to bring up the golem.

Little did Harry know, all his time spent in Texas trying to become a hip hop artist messed with his diction. The chant didn't work, and unfortunately he passed on as a result...