The Great Gatsby stared across the water

The Great Gatsby stared across the water at the flashing green light. With a roar the Great Kraken (en route from Norway) entrapped Gatsby in a suckered tentacle and dragged him

to go shopping with him at the mall. Kraken thought Gatsby' s sense of style was impeccable & he needed an opinion on what he should wear to the Gay Pride benefit next week. Gatsby

was sick of giving monsters fashion advice, no matter how Gatsby dressed them up, they were still monsters. He sailed to Rome to clear his mind and met a talented man named

The Da forest, which was a lot more convoluted than it's simple name. The young Leonardo could have sworn he'd passed the same tree 5 times, though he'd been walking in a straight

edge youth group, sporting internet handles flanked by xX or some derivation and giant safety pins through denim. They were up to three miles a day; shaky baby legs were finally

growing into strong adult legs. Once they were up to four miles a day, they stopped using Xx in their handle names and started wearing polo shirts. They were growing up; they

were so proud of those strong mature legs. Now they were up to nearly 5 miles a day. "Is that the best you've got?!" Coach yelled. Water began leaking from their eye sockets.

No matter how much the team trained, they were never good enough for the coach. They were at the top of the country for cycling but apparently that still wasn't good enough.

So instead of again try to prove their worth to that ungrateful piece of mortadella, they shredded him on a giant slice of pizza and laughed like this: "ha ha. Hooo ha ha ha! Ha!"