"It's 'Kraken Whispers' all over again for

"It's 'Kraken Whispers' all over again for all the good our diplomats have done!" Jarrod collapsed on the divan as the horrible reports came out of the radio from the far planet he

had fired just an hour ago. Jarrod was the Majority Whip in the Interplanetary Union through a freak election and weak coalition. Earth, Ionia, Lepidus, and 234.6 were on the short

end of the relativistically shortened stick as Locuter of Giedraitis had remarked. Jarrod needed the Martian senators vote & used holograms of his encounter with a congretionationa

listic creature, smiling to himself while the senator reacted. With the senator onboard, Jarrod could squeak in during the preliminaries. It started with simple games, escalating

But Jeremy, like all children, was heavily into pot. He was aiming to be a doctor one day so he could deal. He tried to learn plant splicing to infuse apples and bananas with THC.

Jeremy found some success with the cannanana, his hybrid of cannabis and bananas, but mostly it just caused people to manically eat more cannananas and eventually get sick. The oth

erwise joyfully stoned patrons were gagging & suffocating on their own cannananas vomit, which was not at all good for business. So, Jeremy moved away from banana-flavored hybrids

and stuck with the tried and true Sunshine Kush which would get you stoneder than bejeezus but wouldn't leave you drooling. Jeremy's long-term plan was to capture

the flag and win! But alas, in his drooling, stoned state, he forgot he had no legs. Or at least, he couldn't feel them. That would make winning the game rather hard, wouldn't it?