So what's the deal with airline food? I mean,

So what's the deal with airline food? I mean, it's

not that hard to make chicken actually taste like chicken, is it? They say it's because the altitude and the pressure affect the taste buds. I think airline companies are trying to

turn the United States into Soviet Russia circa 1972. That's why the airline companies have totally gone into

investing in aeroflot pre-cold war bombers. Stewardess would serve vodka and be able to preform a carpet straffing. Soviet-era propaganda posters appeared in Hot Topic stores.

My Little Pony merchandise became "My Little Commie" and purported the tagline "Friendship is Leader". Everything became 50s, but was anachronistic and out of spatial place. Time

for war! Lieutenant Marshe suggested we engage the commies hand-to-hoof, but I just wanted to nuke Equestria back to the Stone Age. The commander-in-chief met us halfway by

raccoons in the slightest. Their masks perpetually reminded me of the Thanksgiving incident 7 years ago when

my wife decided to try the "the smokey eyes" look. She thought it was sexy.I had to pretend I did too but it looked hideous. Her makeup melted when she took our Thanksgiving turkey

out of the oven. Just for the heck of it, I decided not to tell her that she now strongly resembled Alice Cooper. Heh Heh. No more Mr. Nice Guy.