56

So IF by the time this story ends, MoralEnd

  • So IF by the time this story ends, MoralEnd has over 10,000 points, everyone on FoldingStory is going to Hawaii to celebrate this great milestone in FS history. If he doesn't,
  • there shall be panic in the streets, prophets decrying the end times as a mathematical limit closes in, and the predicted laws of our universe become subject to arbitrary whim. A
  • cacophony of tedious wordiness drowned out the fun. People waited, hoping the event horizon would silence the drone of the bizarre diatribe and its penchant for peculiarity. I
  • paused for breath and that pause continued... my brain had got stuck. All the words I knew had been used up and I was left with Rhianna's 'Umbrella' playing on a loop in my head.
  • Which is I committed suicide with a breakfast sausage. But the story only begins there. No one can know the horror of discovering what Rhianna's role in the afterlife is.
  • Rhianna had signed the first ever exclusive deal with the Afterlife. Only her music would ever play in the Afterlife, retroactive to Forever until Eternity. Even Taylor Swift was l
  • Infuriated by God's lack of response to her emails. His holy servants were embroiled in controversy over the whole notion of a contract with God, who declared it illegal to do that
  • without the present of a lawyer. However, as a lawyer was not present for this declaration, the servants' decision was irrelevant. She decided that she'd just have to sue God.
  • In order to sue God, the servant reckoned she would have to find Jesus first. Everyone she knew had mentioned finding that bloke, it couldn't be THAT hard to spot him.
  • But Jesus, being omnipotent and all, evaded her by donning a pair of round glasses, a striped sweater and wool toque, and slipping into the crowd, never to be found again.
Started
2013-04-30 00:35:39
Finished
2018-03-24 10:28:07

4 Comments

  1. Avatar

    Woab Mar 24 2018 @ 10:29

    At this writing, MoralEnd has 28,306. I suggest we all go to Hawaii almost three times.
  2. Avatar

    lucielucie Mar 25 2018 @ 15:13

    I expect that's where MoralEnd is now. On top of a volcano, living the dream as World's Greatest Folder.
  3. Avatar

    SlimWhitman Mar 26 2018 @ 16:42

    I raise my Kona beer to that legendary folder with his characteristic wry twist.
  4. Avatar

    PurpleProf Mar 26 2018 @ 20:39

    What the heck happened to him? MoralEnd, please come back!

Want to leave a comment?

Sign up!