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Growing up, I was told we weren't allowed

  • Growing up, I was told we weren't allowed to swim in the ocean. I always believed that was because we could get hurt and my parents were trying to protect us. Little did I know...

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  • I just lost my train of thought because I hear the tiny shuffling feet of the evil prawns coming up the stairs to my back door. They're coming for the garlic mayonnaise! They hate

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  • chilli dip & they despise melted butter - that's for crabs! Prawns always attack in formation. I've got a boiling cauldron of boullion I'll pore on them from the kitchen ramparts.

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  • And a stack of cream pies to lob from the windows. The shish kabob skewers are sharpened and the baster full of turkey drippings. Just let them try. We'll see how far they can mak

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  • e it before the game. It wasn't about who had the most sweet potatoes, it was about who had the most to lose; us or them.

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  • It all came down to endurance. Could you breed endurance? Is it possible for two of the best-trained people on Earth to conceive a child that could withstand a tornado? Let's test.

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  • The 1st hurdle was the pitch. There was a lot of interest in the plan when we pitched it species neutral. But when the public learned we were selectively breeding humans there was

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  • a public sigh of relief in the upper echelons of the private sector, the penthouse kingpins who funded the entire plan were aware of the weak pitch and prepared to make a counter

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  • -feit payment to show their disapproval. Seymore should have known that the check would bounce when he saw "Bank of We Are the Greatest" written at the top, in golden ink. But he

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  • took it to the bank. Opening the bank door, he cold-cocked a robber who was rushing out. Seymore got a $25,000 reward. The fake check? Dropped in the chaos & swept into the trash.

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