Alicia cringed in her bed... she was still

Alicia cringed in her bed... she was still sore from the pain she had endured on the previous day. Not sure what to do, she lay in bed thinking about how yesterday, she got hurt by

a snigger in the coffee shop queue when she asked for silver ball sprinkles on her de luxe caramelocino lite. Alicia shifted slightly but her wounded ego twanged uncontrollably

, like Steve Martin's banjo. "All I need," Alicia replied to the unusual request, "is to get outta here! Oh...and this coffee mug...and...this spoon." More sniggers. "And...this

jelly-filled donut. And that's all I need!" Alicia stormed out, but Mr. Fields was hard on her heels. He didn't give a hoot about coffee, but that donut was his, by golly!

"Alicia" he growled with a hint of a tearful wobble in his voice. "I don't think you understand how hard I worked for that! You can have any other donut in the shop, but please,

Just has to be heated up." Why? The 3,676 preservatives in it would explode on impact if a microwave oven was used. Alice was sobbing while the house burned down before her eyes.

But not to worry, it was not long before it was the turn of her eyes to burn as well. This did not seem to make Alice any happier though. In fact she was screaming & turning crispy

but then the screaming subsided and Alice gathered herself. Her charred form advanced upon me, eyes blazing. "I should thank you before I slay you," she said in volcanic tones. M

y heart began to palpitate as her fiery hands grabbed a flaming sword. Then she plunged it into my torso, and the flames licked my skin, burning me inside and out. Then darkness.