A bunch of kids went walking on a bridge

A bunch of kids went walking on a bridge towards the other side. The kids were begining to cross over the bridge when

a very swole homeless guy decided to mug them. He took their money and ran off in his piss-stained pants and then decided to go buy hats. So he bought a hat and

placed it on his head, however it was not enough to purchase merely one hat. So he purchased many other hats including a purple one, a black one, and a

He now had a matching red hat and shirt. He walked outside and an old woman pushing a cart said, "Where's your pants?" He was naked waist down. He tried to go back inside but

the security guard tapped him on the chest with his nightstick and shook his head. Damn! He grabbed a trash can lid to try to cover his exposed wedding tackle and looked up into

a light that was so bright, so amazing that he forgot the lid. As it CLANGED to the ground, he was again exposed. But he didn't care. He was torn between bliss and bliss.

Every atom in his body reached it's full energy level and ignited. His consciousness was spread across the Miky Way galaxy. His body swam in multiple dimensions. "meh." he thought.

"Same old same old." As his body reached the 5th dimension, a sign post in the distance came speeding into view. "Welcome to the Twlight Zone," it read. It was his third visit to

"The Dim Zone". The predictable timetraveling paradoxes & unimaginative writers got on his nerves so he smuggled in Dali's timepiece & warped the story so it was started by nob0dy.