"Remember when mom thought my stash really

"Remember when mom thought my stash really was oregano and made Chicken Parmesan with it? I can't believe the minister kept snorting that milk through his nose. And who knew

that God would be dining with us disguised as my neighbor. After the Minister said grace, God rolled his eyes and

I caught a glimpse of galaxies whirling in his pupils. I realized my neighbor was really Him, & I should be on best behavior. The clueless Minister meanwhile asked God to punish

unnel cakes too! Anything to get the Youth Group to show up for Bible study.The Cosmic-eyed Neighbor obviously had ulterior motives. He needed an audience to test out his

new invention. The spinning, bouncing, inflatable time machine. But nobody would volunteer because the last person that volunteered complained that to much jelly had been smeared

on the provided peanut butter sandwiches. So they offered bologna sandwiches instead, pointing out that you can always get more food wherever the time machine took you

back. Their plan was to binge on all the food they could find and to activate the time machine at the end of the buffet in order to return to the beginning of the evening and

assassinate the president of the United States of America. Unfortunately, the restaurant's kitchen was somewhat less than sanitary and the would-be assassins contracted a severe

Case of botulism from old sour cream and died by food poisoning. The President ate the same sour cream because the date was smudged. "It was their karma", the police reported.