She was radiant. With a scoop neck tee, gold

  • She was radiant. With a scoop neck tee, gold cross around her neck, and her hair in an updo like that all I could think about was

  • Terri Gross. I don't care how beautiful my date is, I'm in love with NPR's Terri Gross. Her smoth voice, her strangley seductive journalistic distance, her thoughtful questions

  • Just the way she called out to me on every show. "This is (for you) NPR". I, Nathan Presidente Radcliffe, could stand the wait no longer. I will have you, Terri Gross!

  • I waited for her behind the stage, wanting her to see me. I, Nathan Presidente Radcliffe knew that she was for me. Nothing would change that

  • infinite connection between us. I would make her my wife. Mrs Radcliffe suits her so much. It's just destiny, that I would ask her to marry me after the show.

  • But wait! I didn't have a ring! I needed a ring worthy of our infinite connection. I had a half hour before the show would end. I was out of breath by the time I got to Tiffany's.

  • "This gemstone is cloudier than my illegitimate hippy son's room, but it will surely win her heart." I rushed back to the show, but my date was getting cozy in the green room with

  • barrack obama, I was shocked that she was cheating on me. I went to barrack obama and gave him the biggest black eye of his life

  • he said to get nuclear weapons to attack me

  • -- I just hung my head. I was mostly immune to physical and energy attacks, but just hearing that really got to me. It took quite a while before we eventually worked things out.



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