Whatever you do, don't crack up. Just try

  • Whatever you do, don't crack up. Just try to hold it together until we both calm down enough to

  • laugh once we leave the Oval Office. < This < was the text Hillary sent Joe Biden as they sat there listening to Mr. President's strategies for upping his approval ratings.

  • Biden stammered forth in his drunken heroism, "Yo, Hillary, find me a secretary to have a steamy affair with and take the spotlight off that Barack guy... whuu? No takers?" He fell

  • into a deep stupor, experiencing dreams of taking over the world in the form of Emperor Palpatine from Star Wars. "POWER!!!!," he screamed, "UNLIMITED..... POWER!!!!"

  • But unfortunately for Emperor Palpatine, George Lucas was directing the film. For this reason the Emperor's call for unlimited power, was severely limited. He had to settle for a l

  • Low budget lightning attack that couldn't even kill a man covered in circuitry. Truly, the Power of the Dark Side suffered at the hands of budget cuts. The Emperor did not dispair

  • They would just have to downsize their plans for the Deathstar. "We will crush the rebellion with the Heartburn Lightbulb!" He laughed diabolically. "Yes, M'lord", said Vader, but

  • had forgot to make payments, and so his Imperial Star Destroyer was repo'd. Due to funding cuts, Storm Troopers were forced to wear white turtlenecks and carry air-rifles. The reb

  • ate cards that Darth had saved up from upgrading the Emperor's IT system were all used up and the Empire's credit rating plummeted to one star. Darth took off his helmet and said

  • "They give me one star, I give them the Death Star." Darth, helmetless and harrowed, marched to the front of the ship. passing his new trampoline & pinball machine in the hallway.



  1. Chaz Oct 16 2014 @ 17:39

    I can't get the image of Darth Vader on a trampoline out of my mind.

  2. earthquakes Oct 16 2014 @ 20:43

    It's beautiful, isn't it?

  3. SlimWhitman Oct 18 2014 @ 08:58

    Someone needs to reinact this and post it on youtube.

  4. SlimWhitman Oct 21 2014 @ 19:10

    Noone wins the 'Darth Vader on a trampoline' contest just yet, but this was amusing... wookie trampoline http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OrklvP0KwWE

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