We found the fourth colony, about 450 birds,

We found the fourth colony, about 450 birds, on 13 June. It was within the San Jacinto Wilderness, next to a pond on Warner Road. The strange

behavior of this colony was unsettling.All 450 birds were roosting one giant oak, making no sound. We were uneasy as we made camp for the night, but there was no turning back now.

The next morning bright & early we woke to single collective chirp. We exited our tents to be greeted by a rain of bird droppings. The flock took wing releasing a cloud of feathers

and gizzard stones. The birds flew into a pattern, making a giant evil face over us. It looked angry. The flock of birds droves back into the tent. Then I felt the tent lifting

Ironically, Katie was watching UP on her iPad and with her headphones on hardly noticed our tent take flight. This was just the tactical advantage I was looking for & began droppin

down to baritone, much to the delight of my sentient cassette recorder. "Katie's too distracted to mock my sound/As our tent takes flight from the camping ground/Mmmyeah". Her iPad

had a Swiss army cover and came with a variety of tools that could be flicked out the side. She proudly showed us the spoon, fork, knife, screwdriver and

nose hair clipper features of the Swiss army knife and informed us of the gift-with-purchase bonus: a handy-dandy eye booger remover, all for the low, low price of $9.95. I bought

both and gave them to my father for his 79th birthday, though I was tempted to keep them to remove my own. I din't though, and instead bought a garden weasel and a diaper genie.

The weasel promptly wore the diaper genie, then commandeered his wishes to turn the Earth into Weaseltopia. Those little critters get into EVERYTHING!