Flip the burger, peel the cheese, blob of

Flip the burger, peel the cheese, blob of mayo and blotter of ketchup, fancy ketchup. Wilhelm hated this job but, it was the only one he could get because

his reputation as a bad risk had spread through the small town where he held down his job as a sandwich chef during the lunch hour. Keith longed for a chance to

show them that the botulism burger was an acquired taste like blue cheese or durian. But his further experiments at the deli only served to cement his reputation

"Cement his reputation" that's laugh! The Botulism Burger left anyone who ate it with a smooth frozen face. Just be sure your face is in the position you want it to be in!

"I prefer my face to be positioned between two thighs," Chandra said, and her joke stopped the conversation dead. I had told her the NeoNazi FoxNews reunion wouldn't like that sort

-ing hat expression on her face. "Why squeeze your face when you could pull it?" the producer hinted to Chandra. Less discretely, he said, "Plastic is fantastic. Nip tuck!" Chandra

looked at him disgusted. After thinking about it she realized it wouldn't be such a bad idea. "What don't you like about herself?" He said with a smile.

She wondered why he asked this question. It made no sense to her. Maybe this was a bad idea after all. She smiled guilessley back at him and said, "I've got gonorreah."

The nurse at the clinic was so happy to see another "drippy willy". She just loved gonorrhoea as it was so easy to diagnose. The other nurses had much more difficult STI's to