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The moment I dreaded had arrived. It was

  • The moment I dreaded had arrived. It was time to explain myself. "I... I was just trying to..."

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  • Explain yourself? "Yes." It's harder than you thought? "Yes." Are you done explaining yourself? "Am I?" Yes. "Now explain yourself!"

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  • "I won't explain myself," I refused, lifting my chin slightly. My mom yelled in frustration and stormed out of the kitchen.

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  • "Why do you always act like this?" I looked up to see my sister standing in the doorway. "Look, Emily, I'm not going to try to control you, but...you know you can't win against her

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  • cules. He's the strongest in the universe." My sister looked at me sideways. "You're just weird. Get away from me, you freak!" I loved to push Emily's buttons like that.

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  • Emily had lots of easy buttons. She kept them on her easy bake oven. I pushed them all day creeping her out and making her squirm. Until dad tanned my hide that was. His

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  • expertise in hide tanning led to our family empire and my inheritance. With the billions of dollars I now possess, I was able to go out and buy Emily 1000 easy bake ovens, she

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  • uses them to tan the hides of tiny shrews and mice so that she can make clothes and housewares for her Neanderthal Barbie Doll. Barbie has never looked so much like Raquel Welsh in

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  • All natural leather fabrics. They only came in shades of brown and black. Mr. Versace drooled on the plate of steak tartar . The waiter had a long furry tail and wagged it, feeling

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  • frisky, out of season. A side door opened and Debbie Moon is about to walk out when she sees us all standing in the hallway in front of her door. Recognition hits her like a clown.

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