Crime Scene Investigation: Disneyland

Crime Scene Investigation: Disneyland

Crime scene photos: vintage E ticket with “Fantasyland” x’d out; corpse stuck in door of It’s A Small World clock w/ grass skirt stuffed in mouth; topiary dolphin beheaded, bullet

through the temple of Dopey. It was another day at the office for Orlando CSI. Mickey peered over his ray-bans, "Happy and Grumpy and now this... Someone has emotional problems."

Donald Duck was of course prime suspect,with his long-standing criminal record of domestic violence;his violation of probation and court-mandated anger management didnt help either

But Donald Duck was no idiot, and so he hatched a plan to steal uncle Scrooge's millions and fly off to Panama, where he would start his own little business

his cow didn't moo, or his horse didn't neigh. BUT his friend, Micky Mouse, luckily saved the day with some

of those baby toys where you pull the string and animal sounds come out. Problem was, Mickey had borrowed them from Scrooge McDuck without telling him and

all of Duckburgh was being threatened by this scandalous affair. Even though Mickey Mouse tried to involve Mitt Romney, there was no way Goofy was going to back down and all that

talk of Seamus cartop ride or Obamas Woofburger didn't bite.His team of Pitbull lawyers argued for emotional distress:a mouse leashing a dog! Goofy laughed all the way to the Bank.