Have you ever woken up in the middle of the

Have you ever woken up in the middle of the highway on a desert road? I have a few times. There's usually a diner around where I can call for help. I could see it in the distance.

The first few times this happened I though I was being telliported in my sleep. Then I realized it was my parents who were dropping me off way out in the desert. At least they

had the kindness to pack me my favourite snack: preserved chameleon eggs. Hmmmm... yumm. I looked back, and my mom slammed the door and they drove off, without a word. "My Nintend

o girlfriend was carried off by a chubby dragon throwing hammers. Typical. This seems to be a pattern of hers and I'm really getting sick of it

and the way her friends think it's funny to watch me risk my life to rescue her and only then inform me that she's not home. Well, this time is going to be different - I've told

her that I have an Applebee's coupon that expires tomorrow. As I got my food, she called. "Help! My house is burning!" "Isn't that ironic? My steak is underdone!" She didn't

think that was very funny, but I grabbed the bag of marshmallows nonetheless as we hobbled out of the eatery and went to admire the gay lights of her house burning down. Exact to

ken lane was blocking the view from the diner, but the flames peaked higher still, even with the house 1/4 mile away. "maybe we should have moved the dragon", i wondered aloud...

loud enough to be heard by the two Dragon Detection Agency agents, who happened to be seated in the booth right next to us. "GET THEM!" They shouted. "Oops", I replied. Our drag