Plum thought she could become a more famous

  • Plum thought she could become a more famous chef by creating a sauce in her name. Sure, she was drunk on tequila, but Plum had some good ideas while drinking, like mixing

  • donuts and coleslaw. So Plum made a sauce and called it "Plum Sauce." However, the next day there was knock on the door. A lawyer from Kikoman Soy sauce handed her some papers

  • informing her that she was to be beheaded in Tienanmen square at noon tomorrow for sauce infringement and named flavor reproduction. Plum had to flee Beijing or die. Or perhaps

  • she could avoid her capital punishment if she just used a clever capitalist ploy. She renamed her popular condiment "Plum's sauce" & distributed bribes in the Ministry of Commerce

  • via secret codes embedded in lengthy emails. The Anti-Corruption Commission became suspicious of her activities when they came across a spam email containing

  • pictures of dismembered bats. How could she get away with this? The bats wings contained the code "^AE)0". This was an insult as he knew what the meaning was right off the "Bat"

  • so I didn't have to wing it. Bat-battery was not something I took lightly. The offender would never touch my pet fruit bats, I thought, as I hand-fed them fresh grapes.

  • Mr. Bat and family loved all fresh grapes, seedless or not. My landlord did not see them and this was because they had supernatural powers and disguised themselves as humans.

  • But once the moon was visible in the night's sky, they dropped their human form and roamed over the estate, especially around the vineyards. Their wings

  • bursting into flames. Bummer. They forgot it was Tuesday and that's when Rokolf the Dragon roams the sky too, bellowing great bursts of dragonfire.



  1. mojozu May 04 2016 @ 10:01

    So she renamed the sauce from "Plum Sauce" to "Plum's Sauce"... It's a subtle change, but I'm no sauce infringement expert.

  2. 49erFaithful May 04 2016 @ 20:03

    Nobody infringes on my sauce. Nobody.

  3. SlimWhitman May 05 2016 @ 12:25

    Don't get Saucy. Mrs. Plum's husband is a murderer.

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