I pulled up to the stop. Pearl Jam pumping.

I pulled up to the stop. Pearl Jam pumping. Either way led to home but unbeknownst to me at the time a left meant painful death and right meant joyful rendezvous with an old buddy.

I turned left, AND THEN realized my mistake. And gosh, it really did hurt pretty bad at the time. But now time means nothing to me, here in eternity. Sure wish I'd turned right ins

ide my mother. Her womb was so intricate and complicated. The birth sack was like an MC Esher painting. The umbilical cord was like a palindrome. It was maddening.

That is why I was born sticky and mean. I grew rapidly & had a predilection for vulgar language. My eyeballs were solid white. I liked to stand motionless & stare at a person until

my pupilless stair maid em confused for days. That's when eye spook in stained tongs 'n' Phillip Buster dill 'n' gently. Whoa bee two cantered soles hoo

spook two mush lack twines, but udders understudy ice mush of dee thyme, reef dye deed trigh hard enuff, as special Lee, aff day red Joyses Fan & Gan's Wake.

Two sea-cows watched and joked about it being "udderly disgusting". Indeed it was. They knew how to spell, better than the humans. There were no more spelling bees either.

In the hierarchy of spelling knowledge it goes humans, bees, wasps and then sea-cows. Sea-cows don't just lay about all day occasionally munching on the sea grass from the

ocean floor. Few people know this, but sea-cows actually spend 4-7 hours a day studying how to spell sea-cow words. The only reason they come in fourth place is that they spell