56

As starliner Ariela returned to the homey

  • As starliner Ariela returned to the homey sight of Titan, Bertie Grunch, Salad Prep 2nd Class, was filled not with a sense of wonder, but bitter hatred toward the glitterati in the
  • glitzy bow. They loaded glitter into the bowchaser and fired on Titan and LGBT-unfriendly asteroids. Bertie wished to fire lettuce and carrots for his healthy eating initiative, in
  • stead, Ernie shot one asteroid that had a Wendy's and another with a Target, and he accidentally fire pork chops instead of carrots. The Chickfilla Asteroid avoided trouble. But
  • -ter! That's right, butter! That's what saved earth from the Chickfilla Asteroid. You want to know how? He harnessed the
  • power from the quantum vacuum in space that contained an enormous amount of energy from the Higgs particals. The energy in one cubic cm was equivalent to 1000 years of the sun burn
  • all 157 quintillian of Mr. Higgs particals to smelt him into a small dense carbonaceous chunk which my Grandmam Higgs added to her jambalaya chicken to get it a personal touch.
  • Only Grandmam & I knew the secret ingrediant, so we weren't surprised at what happened after our guests ate the Higgs-particle jambalya. Their faces became assymetrical and they
  • got really huge (though that could be the okra). But the brain chemistry stabilized, making this a promising treatment for psychoses, though not a pretty one. A side-effect of
  • the okra was an enormous desire for curry. And a side effect of going to curry houses is Cobra Lager and smashing poppadums in faces for a 'bubble'. But he was more sane, fatter
  • and had a greasy ponytail. He was the poppadum alkie King. He knew there was a brown variety of ketchup. His colon, it is said, is always screaming in terror, for he is a villain.
Started
2012-08-12 18:45:36
Finished
2013-04-03 22:55:58

7 Comments

  1. Avatar

    lucielucie Apr 04 2013 @ 05:40

    for a bubble = bubble bath (barf) = laugh = for a laugh. The only time I'll use rhyming slang to try to amuse you, I expect.
  2. Avatar

    PurpleProf Apr 04 2013 @ 05:45

    Oh, OK... Well, that's the clarification I needed! Fnarr fnarr...
  3. Avatar

    lucielucie Apr 04 2013 @ 08:22

    My pleasure.
  4. Avatar

    inatick Apr 04 2013 @ 10:41

    FYI: Physics Lesson...Prof d-ream recently said that if we could harness the power of the quantum Hoover we'd have enough energy from 1 cubic cm to power the sun for 1000 years.. I heard it on a podcast so included it in the story...
  5. Avatar

    PurpleProf Apr 04 2013 @ 10:44

    ;) I learn something new in FS every day!
  6. Avatar

    inatick Apr 06 2013 @ 00:09

    Prof D:REAM = Prof Brian Cox. He used to be in a pop band called D:REAM who were big in the 90's... now a particle physicist.
  7. Avatar

    lucielucie Apr 06 2013 @ 04:41

    http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=5nptDP35Tb0 This is Harry Hill on Prof Brian Cox

Want to leave a comment?

Sign up!